Wednesday, September 28, 2005

I hate everyone

And apparently the feeling is reciprocated. Not that I give a fuck. My feeling at the moment is that everyone on the planet can go straight to hell. I'm sick that I bought this stupid fucking plane ticket. I don't actually want to go to NY. I don't know why I would go there to see someone who keeps consistently showing me through word and deed that he doesn't truly care about me. I certainly don't want to see the goddamned parrots fly in the goddamned park so that he can bump his ego up further.

I cut half my goddamned hair off because he made a snarky comment about it. A good six inches (no that's not a goddamned euphemism!) The stylist was like, "are you SURE you want to do this?!?" NO! What I want is a goddamned, fucking boyfriend who can say nice things to me. Tell me I'm fucking pretty. Would it fucking kill you???

And STOP fucking saying that you're sorry for not saying anything nice to me and not communicating reasonably with me and not being supportive. Either get it together to do those things or stop pretending that you're capable of it.

I don't want to hear that my hair looks scraggly. I don't want to hear that I need to lose twenty pounds. I don't want to hear that I should take antidepressants. Let's see, do we ALL think that maybe I've heard enough of that kind of shit to last a goddamned lifetime? 'Cause I do.

I told you all this was gonna suck. Kettle???


Blogger anthonygrieco said...

If YOU wanna lose 20 lbs then do it. What was wrong with the hair? You don't owe a man shit. Now if you guys are married or somthing there's the give and take thing . But girls it's too early for the control thing to kick in. Nothing wrong with you caring about how you look, but it needs to be your idea as well- get it? Now if you're not happy with yourself then that's cool, change is helpful at times. God knows I've worked on myself and continue to every day of my life. But dammit folks gotta love you for you FIRST before they start asking for shit like that. I want to look good for my wife. But being negative and pushy about it? I mean WOMEN are all actually kinda allowed to be critical of their men nowdays. But a man gets critical he's branded an asshole, by the woman and everyone else. You just let him know you KNOW that. Act like you're doing a man a favor. It will work out for you if you love yourself more and let that man know it...

11:28 PM  
Blogger anthonygrieco said...

Also... FUCK taking antidepressants. This is from a man who had a club full of female employees with about 70 percent of them on this type of shit and it just makes them fucking psycho. There isn't a damn thing wrong with you other than shit you tell yourself is wrong with you. We all need to take care of ourselves and out environment. No one is perfect. Everyone gets sloppy, everyone has flaws. Doesn't mean you don't deserve respect and love like everyone else. If YOU have shit that you feel is holding you back then work on it. Other than that tell everyone to back off. Now I'm not trying to tell you what to do either, just trying to give you courage and pump you up to fight back. Whether you need to fight youself back or the world or whoever is your decision. You do great here on the internet. You've come a long way towards more self confidence and seem to be doing good. Don't let people bring you down...

11:38 PM  
Blogger Shelly said...

If he's criticizing you now, it will only get worse. Time to start trusting your instincts. My hubby doesn't like that I keep my hair short these days, but it's not his call. It's my hair. He either likes it or not, but he sure knows better than to criticize, so he's allowed to say he prefers it longer. Maybe I'll give him a thrill and grow it in over the winter. But that'll be my call, not his.

Don't let someone's comments influence you to do things you don't want to. You're better than that. And you can never change enough to please a man, cuz they'll always find something else to criticize and something else to suggest you change.

12:46 AM  
Anonymous Ms. A.R. said...

Kettle's definitely on. I think that's all I'll say, until sometime when you might hate everyone a little less, 'k? ;>)

1:33 AM  
Blogger Pup said...

This guy is actually saying this crap to you?!

He has absolutly no right to say any of that to you now or ever. If you had said it, he should be supportive, but there's no excuse for him suggesting or telling you any of that.

Birds. Whatever.

10:35 AM  
Blogger mdmhvonpa said...

Aw crap ...

2:00 PM  
Blogger Sally said...

Oh man. I baked some cookies but I see now that you need them more than I do - to go with the tea.


10:35 AM  
Anonymous Ms. A.R. said...

Sally, you're the sweetest! If anything could cheer her up, cookies with her tea might just do it. :>)

CC, if you're off on your trip today, I hope it goes well. I had to write a note because the word verification, in red letters, says:


Somehow the "ug" and "behed" (if taken by phonics instead of proper spelling, natch) seemed suggestive of the mood of the original post here and seemed too good not to memorialize. I hope things are feeling better for you again. And a figurative, "Off with their heads!" to anyone inconsiderate enough to be cruel to you in the future. (*No literal dismemberment is suggested, of course*) ;>D

Safe trip!

11:21 AM  
Blogger Contentious Chic said...

Thanks guys. It's all over and done with now. I'm not going and CPG and I are history. Turns out that I wasn't the one who wasn't capable of having an adult relationship. Not that I am inclined to put myself out there again just now but broken hearts mend, right? He's just a guy. There are millions of them out thre.

11:24 AM  

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