Thursday, October 13, 2005

Penis Heads!

Fucking world is full of them!

I got in the truck to go walk dogs this morning. Truck wouldn't start. Truck that just got a brand new $600 fuel pump wouldn't start. Call the mechanic. He says that he'll have to replace the fuel pump because it isn't calibrated properly so even though the fuel gauge read between 1/4 and 1/2 full I was out of fucking gas. So yeah, he'll put another fuel pump in it at no charge to me but I've got to get gas in the truck. I've got to call my clients, tell them I'm having car trouble and I'm running late. Call my dad (exempted fron penis-head status) and get him to bring me some gas. Put that gas in the truck. Go to the gas station and put $20 of gas in the truck. Go walk dogs.

Come home and deal with an annoying but non-penis head related web design client issue.

Finally. Finally I get to take a (much needed nap) and yard dude turns up. I hear him poking around in the back yard and walk out to pay him. He's breaking up the pear tree branches that I very carefully selected and hauled home to make presents for some bird people I know.

Me: what are you doing?!?
Him: what were these doing there?
Me: they're for the bird, I brought them home (dragging the now useless and splintered branches the curb.)
Him: when will they come to pick those up?
Me: not until next week.
Him: so now I have to move them to mow?
Me: I didn't ask you to move them at all. They were fine where they were.
Him: you need to try not to be so mad at me.
Me: "..."
Me: ya know, here's your money for this week and I think that next summer I should probably find someone else to mow for me, thanks.
Him: (taking money) so is that starting next summer or today?
Me: seeing as I just paid you for today I'd kinda like you to go ahead and mow.

Why was it a big deal for him to destroy those particular branches? Because they were verified pesitcide free, bird safe wood and the perfect size. That is harder to find than one might think. I had gone to the trouble to find them, put them in the truck and hauled them home leaving them outside in my backyard to cure. And this is the guy who didn't bother to mow my backyard the week before CPG came to visit because he didn't want to have to move the yard furniture out of his way. And he has to be paid in cash but won't let you know what day he is coming to mow. Total penis head behavior.


Blogger Debra said...

Whoa! Stop! Fuel pump has NOTHING to do with your gas gauge! NOTHING! If it is the gas gauge, the general fix for this involves the tedious and annoying (but not generaly too difficult) task of draining and then dropping the gas tank to remove the gauge/fix it/whatever. Even if yuor fuel pump is in the tank, its a seperate item.

I posted to my blog though... over two full pages Had a lot to say apparently.

8:49 AM  
Blogger Debra said...

Whoops... should clarify between the actual guage on your dash and the floaty dealy-bob in your tank... hehe. Almost 6 am and I still haven;t made it to bed.

My word verification is "cikuval". That has to have some hidden meaning, right?

Morning sunshine!

8:50 AM  
Blogger Sally said...

Oof, you're well rid of lawn penis-head!

8:53 AM  
Anonymous Ms. A.R. said...

Heh-heh..."lawn penis-head." I've seen pink flamingos and lawn jockeys, but this creates a very funny mental image for garden decor. ;>)

3:59 AM  

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